Sunday, September 29, 2013


Again, I am so amazed by how specific a certain category I took for granted can get (e.g. bulbs, pastries, bread) and am so appalled by my own ignorance haha. I think my brain is wired quite naively - how do people remember all these + many many more!! Ok, I think I sound foolish now lolx.

This infographic about wine glasses and their uses might be even better:

Saturday, September 28, 2013


是時候 該轉身就走
從此放棄 我們渴望的永久 


一切很灑脫 好好看著你走
堅強該是我 給你的自由







Wednesday, September 25, 2013

50 Shades of Grey trilogy
I stumbled upon the first book at a tag sale in Spore and brought it all the way to New Haven before I could read it (I was reading Game of Thrones Book 4 back). Of course, being the bookworm that I am, I had to finish up the other 2 to complete the trilogy, thanks to New Haven Public Library for the e-books.

I was pretty intrigued, because I have never explored erotic literature before. As it turns out, the trilogy is quite a read.

Protagonists: Anastasia Steele and Christan Grey
Synopsis: Recent college graduate Ana Steele and business tycoon Christian Grey met in an unlikely interview and found mutual attraction. Anastasia has never been in a relationship and Christian has a dark brooding past that haunts his present, resulting in his domineering nature. But expectedly, their mindsets of the world and themselves changed when their romance sparked off, along with their erotic adventures, mainly BDSM (Bondage Domination Submission Masochism). They started to embark on a journey of mutual and self-exploration, both physically and emotionally.

E.L. James started this as a fanfiction to the Twilight trilogy, got it published and now it's moving on to the big screen! As it turns out, having also read the Twilight trilogy, I felt there is a lingering sense of similarity. Just a very slight shadow. Like how Christian and Edward are both self-loathing and ashamed/frightful of their past and how they are drawn to Ana and Belle, intrigued by a certain trait that perhaps will only be privy to the male protagonists themselves (C's BDSM tendencies and E's telepathy). And of course, how A and B are portrayed initially as inexperienced or powerless but are in fact very strong women that ultimately saved the day. Their lives as the rich. Similarities between Mia and Alice, Elliot and Emmett.

Well, for romantic suckers, this trilogy will be a great read. I also think this has been pretty educational and enlightening, for my first foray into unexplored literature. The scenes can get really raunchy and graphic and they pique you in the right places. I wonder how the movie is going to be shot.... Beneath all these "kinky fuckery" (sic), I feel there are a number of pertinent messages conveyed about relationships: among them, openness and communication.

So, if you are looking to try a different genre, or an open mind looking for new literary adventure, this might be the one you are looking for. I mean it's got everything: romance, life, action and sex. Just a little more explicit sex. Shrugs.

Saturday, September 21, 2013


Before this, my mind was all about planning the future. Scrimping, saving, a single-minded drive to finish my PhD ASAP, where to plan for my postdoc/industry to set up family, marriage...

Right now, while much of those start to shrivel and wilt (except to finish my PhD ASAP), I need to take stock of where I should be heading. Time off to let things sediment after the storm.

Maybe I should plan a vacation somewhere. That might be a welcoming distraction at the very least.

Friday, September 20, 2013


I got the finality that nailed the coffin.

From here on, I need to pick up my pieces. The very soul that has been shattered to smithereens.

Somehow, there is this lingering sense of betrayal, even though there were no third parties involved. I had no time to ponder, no time to think and no time to react. I had no inkling. Whenever I asked, there was nothing from her and it seems like my fault. Or maybe I had always made it seem like my fault. But all the while for months, she was distancing herself. Unknowingly even to herself, she was preparing her emotional armor. And I was led on, clueless, thinking I was being the unreasonable one and I should be making amends. And she did make me make amends, when all I did was communicate. On hindsight, I was stupid. I couldn't even see the signs. How different she was from before... But I guess, the distance really took its toll...

I need to wake up from all my delusions.

Picking up the pieces will cut me. I need to pull out the thorns, one by one. They will leave scars. But they will also dry and leave scabs. Gosh, this hurts so much. Like a lance, right through the heart.

For now, let me grieve. Let me mourn. Let me cry. Just. Let me be...

Monday, September 9, 2013

I am hurting ... so bad ...

Sorry I haven't been updating on the front. I realize my entries are all in my drafts...

I remember there used to be a day when you loved me like crazy. We could stay awake for days just to be in each others arms. We lived for the next moment we could be together again and were so full of passion… But those days are just a memory now… I want to work on us… but let’s not try to be perfect, let’s just be honest… share with me what’s in your heart, share what triggers your pain, share what excites you and let’s find a way to bring that passion back again… ~Karen Kostyla

Monday, September 2, 2013

Arthroscopy Final

My surgery was 10th June 2013. Now it has been almost 3 months.

There is no pain at all when walking, jogging and post-jogging. The only time I felt a little discomfort is when I bend my knee for too long, due either to sitting down or crossing my legs.

For you guys out there, this is just a feel of the timeline (abridged):

1 week : walk with crutches
2 weeks: walk with limping
4 weeks: walk normally
8 weeks: jogging with post-jogging pain and discomfort; able to travel
12 weeks: normal walking, jogging and post-jogging. discomfort when bendings.

Throughout the whole process, my motto is not to rush things. I tend to add a few days more in addition to the doctor's and physical therapy's instructions, unless they specifically insisted.

I have only tried squash once so far. I will start easing into it slowly.

Hope this helps to give an idea of the timeframe.

And I just received my bill of a $100. It's apparently not free then. But at least it's not $10,000 =)